This week has been a learning experience for me. I’ve spent a lot of time going through some stories of my own personal life, the stories of others, and the view of the future. When you look at your past and see what you learned from it, take those things that people would say are failure or loss, and ask yourself if you have used them to take your life to new levels of success? You see, everyone has the same view of life: we all can look at our past, see if we learned from the mistakes or repeat them and we can see either success or repeated failure. That will show you where your future is.
I have faced loss so many times in my life, then kept the hope alive to start over. When you face a loss in any way in your life that is the one thing you don’t ever want to lose: hope. The purpose to this week is to help you see there is life after your loss.
Just like when we lose a loved one we must face a time of mourning, a time to sit back and reflect on that part of our life. We are not to stay there, to linger in the loss. In the next month we are going to have a memorial of the 10th year anniversary of 9/11. That happened to our country ten years ago. Some people went on to build much better lives to honor those who lost lives that day. They will actually be opening a monument to what happened in New York next month.
In your life, when loss happens you build a memorial to it, but also take your life to a new level to honor the fact that you learned from this loss. If we lose a loved one to something like 9/11 or war, we build something to honor the bravery of the person we lost.
The main purpose I had for this week was to learn and grow from every chance you get, to become a better person, to grow your dream even bigger out of the loss you had. For me, with each and every business that didn’t work out, some of them I closed the door and some I sold out just to let the headaches go. They are not in the past; I learned from them to build the next one better–not always bigger, but better.
This week we mentioned Steve Jobs and how he resigned from his position at Apple. If you go back and check his story, he was once kicked out of Apple. Imagine if he had left the world of computers because he could not take that loss. Think of the tech products that would not have been invented. He started another vision and built it, till the day came that his former company bought out his new company and kept him on as CEO.
When you get a vision for something, a loss like that is only a stepping-stone to get you to continue towards the path you were working on. It may mean you have a mountain or two to go around to get there.
A loss I had a few years ago that I do not speak of much was the loss of a lady who I dated. I believed she was the woman I was going to spend the rest of my life with. Well, it did not work out. When that relationship ended it really knocked me down. I ended up losing most of my close friends at that time and found myself starting over with a small team of just me.
I tell that story because now, as I look back, it was one of the greatest things that happened to me. I did not date for a few years after that; I was able to really build my life. Then when I did not expect it, in 2009 I met a woman who is truly my life match. We have so much more of a joyful time with each other, have so many common dreams. With Gwynne in my life I now have two successful businesses where she is my partner, not just the person who hangs on my arm for public appearances, but partners as we share everything, even our adult kids.
So when you feel loss is the end, take the words of Gene Simmons to heart: “Every day above ground is a good day.” I lost my dad this past year, and yes I miss him. But he wanted me to honor him by moving forward with my life, to enjoy every day I have with this life, enjoy all the time I have with my family. So you must move past the lost part of your life now. Step out and make new plans to start over. That is the purpose of lost, to tell you it’s time to start over and make it better.
I’m Tim Gillette, the Rocker Life Coach. It’s your time to live the life you always dreamed of, to learn to love what you do and those you share this life with. Let me help make you the RockStar in your world. My specialty is helping start over after loss and come out better than ever! Contact me today and let’s get started!