How Often Do You Use the Word “NO”?

Good Thursday morning to you. As we are going through this week on the theme of comfort zones, I also had to get out of my own comfort zone to keep on working. If you read yesterday’s blog, you read about how I had to deal with still being sick, and keeping the blog updated daily. Well it gave me a question to think about. When you are trying to grow in an area of your life how often do you use the word “no”?

If you were pushing towards building a new business, would you tell a possible client that you could not meet them? Would you put off a chance to go someplace to promote your business?

There have been times in the creation of my business that I’ve received invitations to speak at an event in other towns. Just recently I was asked if I could speak at a luncheon that coincided with plans I had made to join my honey on a business trip for her job. I accepted the speaking opportunity to further my business rather than take the time away, which would have been more for vacation than work.

To move out of your comfort zone – whether it is in your personal life or your business – you will have to make some choices. Sometimes the choice will be “either-or.” When saying the word “no” it is not always something that keeps you in a comfort zone. But to get out of a comfort zone you will often have to say “yes” to some things that you really don’t want to do.

Think of the times growth happened when someone had to say “yes.” For example, think if you were to enter a diner and get a burger, fries, and a coke. You then ask your server to bring you ketchup and salt but are told “No, we don’t have that here!” They heard that these two things could cause some people to have health problems, so they removed them from their business. What is your response to something like that? How do you feel when a business makes those choices for you?  I would have to tell you that I would personally not be returning to that business.

Now I use this example knowing most diners that serve hamburgers would not remove those two things, but wanted to use that example to show one thing. When you want to grow you will have to step outside your personal beliefs sometimes to offer services to those who are seeking them. I know of a few companies that have a policy they teach to all of their employees to just say “yes.” That means if a customer wants something that is a little bizarre, but it’s within the power of the employee to get it for them, then do it.

That philosophy is at the heart of the customer service strategy at the Ritz Carlton hotel chain. Employees there are empowered to say “yes” to customer requests and are even given access to money to follow through. That level of empowerment isn’t just reserved for the top people at each hotel; many, many people have the authority to take care of customers.

With many of my clients, who are starting over in life, I have to teach this concept in the beginning. When you want to grow, especially after you are starting over after a big failure, you will have to say “yes” to some things you really don’t want to do.

As we wrap up today, take a look both at your business, as well as your personal life. Evaluate everything you have said “no” to in the past 30 days. Did you turn down a growth opportunity?  Each time you are asked to do something that could cause you to move forward in personal growth or business growth over the next 30 days think of these three things before you say “no”:

  1. If I say “no” will this close the door on other chances for me to grow in this area of my life or business?
  2. If I say “no” is it because I have a fear of what is on the other side of this choice?
  3. If I say “no” will it cause personal harm to myself or my business?

With those three things you can learn to judge when you say “no.” Use it when it’s for your personal safety. For example, say you just got out of a marriage and you are asked to go on a date when you know you’re not ready to date again. That is when it’s a proper time to say “no.” But if it’s been a long time and you know you would like to be in a relationship again but are afraid of the risk, “no” might be holding you back from growth. After all we are in a growth process here. Don’t let “no” keep you inside a comfort zone when it’s no longer useful.

I’m Tim Gillette, the Rocker Life Coach. It’s time for you to live the life you have been dreaming of, to love what you do and those you share your life with, and become the RockStar in your world. My specialty is helping you move from hiding in your comfort zone to finding a place where you can grow and achieve. Contact me today to see how I can help you.

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