Leaders Face the Hard Times and Keep Going

PopeI heard the news yesterday morning and it made me ask a question: how can a man who has worked so hard to reach the pinnacle of success want to step down? If you have not heard the news, the Pope will retire on February 28th.

Almost everyone in the world knows who the Pope is; he is the leader of the largest church in the world. Most everyone would agree that he is a good leader. To become the Pope, to get to that place in the Catholic Church, you must have been a good leader for many years.

This brings up a question for our week on good leaders: do they have tough times? I asked the question about facing tough times on my Facebook page yesterday to see what others would say about it.

One of the best responses was from my good friend and founder of the Association of Woman Entrepreneurs, Tera McHugh. She wrote the following:

“My secret is surrounding myself with people that believe in me, often more than I believe in myself! People that I feel comfortable being vulnerable with & people that respect me enough to be honest and supportive! It’s all about having a powerful peer group!!”

What most people call a “tough day” a leader like the pope or, say, the president of the United States would call that a “normal day.” These people did not get to leadership positions by letting things get to them.

A good leader is someone who makes choices when they appear to have no choice. For years people would tell leadership me about qualities they viewed in me. As a leader you do not stop and ask yourself if you are a leader; you make a decision and keep moving forward.

I knew a young boy whose mother was in a car accident. The boy was able to talk with his mom and get hold of emergency crews. Talking with his mom in that tough time was not something any little boy would be expected to do. He just acted, doing those things he had seen someone else do in a movie. All his actions were that of what we call a leader, making the tough choices without feelings getting involved.

Good leaders surround themselves with other leaders who build and encourage them to make the choices when most of us could not get past the emotions of the decisions that need to be made.

Sometimes a leader must make the tough choice of knowing when he cannot continue to lead. That is when they make the choice to step down and find the best person to continue with the vision they started.

So what is your challenge today? Are you able to make the choices that need to be made? Are you ready to become a good leader?

RockStar  Tim Gillette I’m Tim Gillette, the Rocker Life Coach. It’s time to live your dreams, to love what you do and share it with those you love. Are you ready to make 2013 a year that rocks?

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My Generation

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Good Thursday morning to you. If you have not heard by now another of our great musicians in Rock ‘n’ Roll history has passed away. Davy Jones, the singer from a group called The Monkeys, at 66 years of age left this earth. In a week in which we’re talking about the word “different,” I had picked a song from The Who to use this week, to talk about how from one generation to the next what we think is normal will be considered strange by our parents – and by our kids.

I wanted to use the song in the title to talk about how Rock ‘n’ Roll has changed over the years, how we have changed over the years, how each generation has a different way of doing things. Many times today in our world someone will hear the phrase, “That’s not the way we did it in my day.” I wish I could tell you how many times I see the things my kids are doing and want to tell them, “When I was your age we did…”

In a world that has system after system failing when we have troubles in politics, troubles in our economy, troubles in the way we see different ways, when life is going to be different, that same old way of doing things will not always work. You will have to learn to do some things differently if you want to make a success of it.

I was thinking, as I heard the news of Davy Jones yesterday, how as a child I remember The Monkies on a TV show. In the ‘70s we had a black and white television. It was this big box about the size of a small chest of drawers. We had three channels to watch. When you fell in love with a show like The Monkies I remember having to count the days till it was back on again. Then I remember when it was no longer on TV.

Now we have a TV that is as thin as our table top was back then, it can be moved from our room to another by one person. We have over 500 channels to choose from. If you miss your show you can record it on a computer device. If you like a show on a certain network you can watch it there many times over, as it will be repeated throughout the week. We watch movies and our favorite now comes on the movie channels about four times a day.

This time of just watching the TV is different than when I was a child; imagine where it will go in the future. As a child, a computer was a big thing taking up a whole room in a company building somewhere; now I hold my computer on my lap and have a tablet iPad that I can watch videos on. Imagine how the world will be different.

So let’s look at how we deal with differences in the generations of change, how we can use them to build on our success and not let ourselves hold on to the old-fashioned traditions that would keep us down.

Yesterday we spoke about how we need some sort of structure, or discipline, to work towards our goals. Before that we talked about defining who we are, and started the week off with using our belief in purpose.

No matter what it is that you find out you are, what system you have to work to get to your goals, you are going to have to accept the fact that the world is going to change so you will also have to adapt. I have to adapt all the time. As I mentioned last week, people tell me, “You have a great idea” all the time. It fits with not only this generation (our kids’ age), but mine as well.

I have to always be in a process of change to accept the fact I need to be able to relate to those who maybe never heard Rock music from my generation. But then, think of the people who are in the generation of listening to The Monkeys or The Beatles. They know of bands I have never heard of. I have to build and expand my great niche to be able to relate to all music, from all generations. If I don’t, my idea won’t be a great one any longer.

So in closing, let me leave you with this; find out who you are, find a path to take and learn to live in this generation, the here and now.

I’m Tim Gillette, the Rocker Life Coach. It’s time to live your dream, to love what you do and those you share life with. Love where you came from but be the RockStar now.

A Blog That Matters Week

Good Monday morning to you. Was that not a great Super Bowl yesterday? No matter who was playing or if you cared who won, it was a great game. Thinking of the week I had planned and watching the Super Bowl this weekend helped me to launch this week’s topic, which is “What does it takes to run a blog?” People ask me that all the time. Another question is, “Do you really write all that stuff?” Then I get the “How do you do that?” question.

Well one of the great things that I tell people to do to become a RockStar in their world is a tip I have used over the past ten years. I have found it is a tip that other RockStar trainers use also. Even my buddies, Mike O’Neil and Craig Duswalt, use this: Don’t run around and tell everyone what you are going to do. Go out and do something, then let your work speak for itself. I have heard it said another way: Don’t tell, but do. Or: Go and do it then tell others how you did and coach them to do the same.

I have built a blog and now am working on building two more. So many have started a blog as well from the very ideas that I do and formed a niche that is all theirs. Check out my bike riding buddy Jnthn Roadblock in his blog. Or my partner and fiancé Gwynne and her Lady Biker Travel blog. I also work to help Brent and his Biker Monkey blog. They all have a different message and I love to see them succeed, many of them have the links back to my blog as they have looked up to me. If you remember, last year I had a post titled “How did you do that?” It’s about helping others. One of my mentors was Zig Ziglar, who is well known for saying “You can have what you want if you help enough other people get what they want.”

So I am always out to help others succeed on their own blogs. I am always willing to jump in to help in a book launch as I will with my good friend Jessica Rector this coming spring. I was glad to be on Mike and Lori’s Rock the world radio show. It’s about always being willing to help.

This week I want to give you some tips from those who have helped me, as well as things I have learned along the way on how I built this blog and how I make it work. I will be doing a post each day about how others helped me and if you want you can get the same help from them as well.

I’ll have tips from Steve Scott, who wrote a great program about affiliate marketing called Affiliate Marketing Without the BS. Steve is the one who prompted me to write more often and find quality material.

Then there is Rhonda Hess. Her coaching programs and the school she helped create with Will Craig, called Coach Training Alliance, are what I used to learn to be a coach.  They actually have a book on becoming a coach.

I learned how to really write a blog that matters and build a world of quality and make it my own from another great – Corbett Barr from Think Traffic who wrote the excellent program, Start a Blog That Matters.

I will tell you this week about the great processes I learned to use and some of the great tools that make it easy from Mail Services, called Mail Chimp, to the great services to manage my writing with my editor using Drop Box.

I will share how I started on WordPress.com, but then moved to a self-hosted site with a WordPress.org format. I learned what the best deals are on buying domains, learned how to get the domain that best fits a brand I want. I will also share with you some of the places you can get affiliates and how I use them.

I work with offline companies to provide products and for speaking at live events. I have even built a way that I’m able to market the lifestyle I live. I get many deals on the things I use and own; it’s like making your life a walking commercial and getting paid to do the things you enjoy, all while sending business to others.

So this is the week’s theme and you will want to be here for each post. If you want to learn how to live a dream like I do, how to write a blog and use your life and your stories to change the world you live and, as well as do what Zig said – help others get what they want – then you will get that this week. Get ready to rock with your blog.

I’m Tim Gillette, the Rocker Life Coach. It’s time to live your dream, to love what you do and those you share life with. Build a blog that matters and become a RockStar in your world.

Kick Start Your Heart

The year was 1987. It was a wild tour with Motley Cruë on tour with Guns ‘n Roses. The bass guitar player for Motley Cruë, Nikki Sixx, had a very long history of trouble with the drug heroin. Nikki Sixx was partying with Slash from Guns ‘n Roses, I believe; he had way too much and overdosed. He was considered dead for a full two minutes, until an ambulance crew arrived. The leader of that medic team that night was a big Motley Cruë Fan. He is believed to have said one of his music heroes was not going to die on his shift.

I do not know the entire story because I was not there; I only read of it on news web sites, and in accounts by Nikki Sixx. What I can tell you is that most people who come back from an experience like that never forget it. Nikki Sixx wrote a song about it.

The band, Motley Cruë, is one of my favorites; it has always been. I use stories like this in my work and this is one of the things that makes the way I work with people in coaching stand out. I know many coaches, speakers, and motivators who would never have researched a story like this to use for their programs. Nikki is not exactly the kind of person who would speak at a local church. In fact, my personal experience growing up in church was always being pointed away from stories like this.

Nikki stands out to me because not only did his best years happen after this event, but some of his best happened after he cleaned up from the life of heavy drugs. As I have said his music will not make the church scenes. But his motivational story is one that impacts people – just like his life and music had impacted a paramedic enough that he vowed as a fan to kick-start Nikki’s heart because he refused to see him die.

Now let me tell you the story of another person I know personally who had a near-death experience like Nikki Sixx. Tim Newland is a friend of mine from the Dallas area. He is the current president of the Passion Riders chapter of the Christian Motorcyclist Association, in Carrollton, TX. Tim has had heart problems and has had a device implanted to help keep his heart working properly. A few years ago, before I met Tim, he was out on a motorcycle ride with some friends. Tim fell down in the parking lot where they were meeting and those who were with him claim he died that day. The riders took their own form of “we are not letting him die on our watch.” They all put their hands on Tim and prayed over him. He came back and now Tim, just like Nikki, lives a life that has much more passion than before.

So what is your passion in life? I hope for you that it will not take lying on the ground with friends praying over you, or an ambulance crew giving you two shots of adrenaline to make you come to life with passion. In this week where we are talking about standing out from the crowd to succeed, both Nikki Sixx and Tim Newland are people who stand out. So is it time to kick-start your heart?

I’m Tim Gillette the Rocker Life Coach. It’s time to live your dream, to love what you do and those you share life with. Kick-start your heart with passion to be the RockStar in your world.

Soul Surfer

If you have not seen the movie, Soul Surfer, I recommend it. When starting to plan out this week, this movie was not on my list of the things I had planned to use as an illustration. But after hearing someone who related their life to the story in this movie, I had to check it out.

The movie is about the story of Bethany Hamilton, a 13-year-old surfer who lost her arm in a shark attack. The movie shows her struggles to live with the new challenge in her life, learning to balance life as a surfer with one arm. It shows her, among other things, learning to help others who are afraid of the water after a tsunami hits.

Her story is a strong one when we think of those who struggle with a loss. They have to overcome some great struggle to succeed. When thinking of her story and the theme for this week, I wanted to add this movie as one to give life lessons on standing out. At the end the movie she is asked in an interview if she could go back to that day would she not go surfing? She replied she would still choose to lose her arm because now she can embrace more people with one arm then she could before with both arms.

In Dallas, we have a similar story happening now. The family of Lauren Scruggs is facing a similar loss. She lost her hand and an eye when she accidently walked into a spinning plane propeller in December. I have known her family’s struggles long before this happened. Her parents have chosen to take the trials they went through with their marriage and make a ministry out of it, helping others restore marriages as they did with theirs.

Some who struggle with a loss will give up the spirit that kept them chasing a dream. Others will take strength in the loss; they will find a new way to pursue the God-given dream that is inside of them. When they are able to see past the struggle, when they watch the dream come true, they will be like Bethany and say, “I would still give up that arm.” You will be able to do far more without the one thing that is taken than you were able to do with all still intact.

So, in your life, what have you lost? No matter what it is, you need to keep two things in mind that will support you to do the purpose you have yet to do on this earth.  It is that purpose that can be your driving force. In my own life, when I set out towards my own purpose I, had things fall into place to take care of things I had lost.

When you have a major loss like the one shown in this movie, there are two things you must keep in mind to keep going. They will help you to perform the purpose you still have on this earth. Remember, if you are still breathing, your job on this earth is not done.

So what are the two things we need to hang on to?

1.  Hope. That’s right. Even through loss, you need to be a person of hope. I have spoken on this subject many times. Those who have hope that a better purpose is coming along and start a journey to look for it with hope succeed and stand out.  I know that every time I had a business fail or when I woke up in the hospital after an epilepsy seizure, it was hope that it was going to be OK that got me back in the game. I knew that something better was coming along. Even when going down some deadend roads that left me having to start over again, hope was the thing I held on to that better days were coming.

2.  Spirit. No matter what it is you have lost, never lose the spirit and drive to find what it is you are to do now. I know when we were younger we were all told “You can do anything you want; if you want to be President of the United States some day you can.” We had that belief for a great life; we started making plans to see a dream of passion of purpose come true. The truth is those who achieve the dreams they had as a child all had to lose a few things along the way. We all had to walk up a few mountains along the path to make that dream come true.

So if you want to stand out, find the ways to keep your balance when life takes something from you. Life is always going to take you on turns that were not in your plan. You will have things taken from you. The way you handle it, the new things that you learn to do will be what make you stand out in a crowd of hundreds doing the same business you are. No matter what you have lost, use it to be the stand-out person in your world.

I’m Tim Gillette, the Rocker Life Coach. It’s time to live your dream, to love what you do and those you share life with. It’s how you rebalance life after you lose that thing you thought you needed to be in balance that will make you the RockStar in your world.

Stand Out From the Crowd

Good Monday morning to you. With the month of January winding down, how are your goals for 2012 working? In a world with so many people trying to fit a mold, I want to take this week to talk about something that is needed in our world. It’s time to stand out, to break out of your mold today.

They say that insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting the different result. Then you read that you must find something that you succeed at it and do it over and over again to perfect it. It seems like a paradox to make it work.

When I looked at my own life, the times that I was successful were those times when I would make a brave move, and it just worked. Then everyone would look and ask me, “How did you make that work?” Being the stand-out person could get you the contract you were looking for, or the sale that was needed. But this also would set you up to do something again.

To stand out from the crowd you must do things that make you stand out, and you must do them as a consistent part of life. With the world economy we have seen over the past few years, so many of the companies and people we are trying to serve are cutting budgets. If you want to keep the job you have or get that job you’re looking for, you have to develop a life of being different, but not like that creepy kid from high school. You have to stand out. So how do we take a step-by-step way of changing and standing out from who we are now?

We have all heard the stories and even seen the pictures of snowflakes. We’re told every snow flake is different, each has a different shape. In life we all have the same different shape like that snow flake. Those things that you have gone through up till now are what give you that unique shape that makes you stand out from the crowd.

The funny thing about me is that I have been known more as a consistent and steady person. But looking at when I would create a business, I always had some creative idea that made for a great take off. And I found that it takes another great creative idea to keep moving.

The thing that attracts most people that come to me for coaching is they all want to find that one thing that would make them stand out. They have come to a place that they realize they keep running up against a wall with every one of those cookie cutter business ideas they’ve tried. The problem is we are all unique, we are different. Learning to make that a success is the key to building your own success.

With the rest of this week we are going to talk about the stand-out thing I use in coaching, and speaking: rock music, movies, American pop culture, and entrepreneurship. I will be telling some stories of how stand-out people find success in life.

I’m Tim Gillette, the Rocker Life Coach. It’s time to live your dream, to love what you do and those you share life with. Learn to stand out and be the RockStar in your world.

Guest Post: Creating a Healthy Environment

I’m thrilled that Tim has asked me to contribute a posting to his week on creating an environment that will help you succeed. I’m especially happy because he’s asked me to talk about something I’m very passionate about: being healthy. Now, I don’t claim to be the healthiest person out there and I’m not what you’d call a health nut. I’m not hyper-vigilant about additives in my food; I don’t take any supplements, I’m not a picky eater at all and I drink water out of  the tap.

I want share my thoughts on living a healthier life. Because I do have a passion for helping people do just that. A little about me: When I was a young child, I was overweight. As a teenager, I joined a swim team and lost a lot of weight, becoming really thin. Then I quit swimming, gained weight. I had children and gained some more weight. I got divorced and then lost a lot of weight. Then I gained it back and finally found myself facing middle age almost 100 pounds overweight with no one to blame it on but myself.

At that point, I joined Weight Watchers and lost almost 100 pounds. I have kept that weight off for more than 10 years and now work for them. But this isn’t a blog about Weight Watchers. It’s a blog about making a commitment to be healthier.

Weight loss, like any other undertaking, requires a long-term commitment and a willingness to stay the course, even when you aren’t getting the results you want. I firmly believe that we have set ourselves up with expectations of achievement without paying our dues, so to speak. Let me give you an example. It took me 15 months of making modest food and exercises changes to lose 90 pounds. But if I were to turn on the TV on a given night and watch a show like Biggest Loser, I would see people losing weight a lot more quickly – much more quickly than the average person should aspire to lose without constant medical supervision.

We all know someone who has taken a drastic measure to loose weight (lap band, gastric bypass, etc.). And the pounds seem to just fall off them. In fact, these surgical interventions are as close as we’ve come so far to a “magic pill” for weight loss. Believe it or not, though, I know many people who have lost hundreds of pounds this way but have gained it back – just like anyone else. There is no magic pill.

I’m not here to come down hard on people who choose those routes, but I do believe that the one thing we are becoming is a society that is unwilling to commit a time investment to what we want. “I want it all and I want it now.” That’s our American mantra. But when it comes to most things, “now” isn’t going to happen. We’ve got to be ready to invest time.

Why is this so important? You know the phrase “When the going gets tough, the tough get going.” Well, I think we’re unwilling to work through tough times. We tend to give up as soon as we have a set back. When it comes to committing to a healthier lifestyle, you must be prepared for there to be days when you don’t want to exercise, even though you know it’s good for you. If you are working to lose weight and have committed to eating less and making healthier choices there are going to be days when you eat more than you planned or made choices you later regret. If you have the  mindset that one day of falling off your plan means you’ve failed, you have a lot of heartache ahead of you!

I have a member, Judy, who is in her 60s. When she joined my meeting, she was 200 pounds overweight. Over the course of two years, she has lost more than 150 pounds and will achieve her weight goal this year. During those two years, she had a period of almost six months where she only lost a total of four pounds! That could be very demoralizing to someone who, while she had lost a lot of weight, still had a considerable amount to lose. But she knew that what she was doing would pay off in the long run, even if it didn’t seem to be working at the moment. At the time, she had actually started an exercise routine (something she hadn’t done in 40 years), had hired a personal trainer, and made huge strides there. Now she’s back to a regular pattern of losing weight as well – thanks to her persistence and her faith that even very small steps get you closer to your goal.

I believe that a healthy lifestyle is one of moderation, managed enjoyment things, and long-term commitment to our goals of making healthy choices. If you are starting, as I did, very overweight with a closetful of bad habits to change, you must be prepared to devote time – a lot of time – to making changes. You must be ready to see the scale go up sometimes. If you have made a commitment to true and lasting change, you aren’t focused on the events of one day in which you might have made regrettable choices; you are focused on how tomorrow – in fact, how your next meal – is an opportunity to get back on track.

Tim talks a lot about starting over with nothing. One great thing about leading a healthier lifestyle is that you can’t undo all your hard work in one day. If I set my mind to it, I could spend all our money in less than an hour. I cannot possibly gain back the weight I’ve lost in a single day (no matter what I eat).

I’ve begun a training program because I hope to run a half marathon later in the spring. Wednesday I simply couldn’t get a run in because of circumstances completely outside my control. One missed workout doesn’t undo all the other workouts that have preceded it – unless I give up.

That’s the best news about focusing on healthier choices: if you have a bad day, you can fix it immediately. What’s the payoff? Not only will you feel better, but I believe you will learn disciplines that you can apply to any area of your life, whether it’s delaying a major purchase until you can pay cash for it, working an extra job for a period to pay off debt you’ve built up, or making sacrifices to start your own business. All the skills are the same: you build strength through persistence and determination.

Today’s Guest post is from my Partner in life, and later this year she will be my new wife. She also has a blog about being a lady biker. You can read more of her material at ladybikertravel.com.

 If you would like to guest post on our blog email me at : tim@rockerlifecoach.com , lets talk about a subject coming up and if you could give some input.

I’m Tim Gillette the Rocker Life Coach. It’s time to live your dream, to love what you do and those you share life with. Live a healthy life long enough to become the RockStar in your world.

Love What You Do

Good Thursday morning. How is your success environment this week? One by one my posts have been about the important things that help us build success in life. They are not about what makes us successful, but what helps us build an environment of success.

Setting up your world for success takes some work. First we went into our home, then our relationships. Today we are going to talk about the work we do and setting our work environment up for success.

When it comes to work, first we have to address the fact that it is work. Yesterday we spoke about how we build relationships we want. Sometimes they take work to build, like your marriage or partnership. It takes time to get to know someone and work to build a strong relationship.

Today in the subject of doing work we love, it’s important to remember you may have to work at something you don’t like to get to what you do like. For years I have said you need to love what you do. In many cases I worked at jobs I hated, but loved the work. The idea is if you learn to love what you are doing, you do it better. If you are doing the part of the job that you do not like, it’s OK not to like it. You need to build an attitude that you love what you do and become a success at it. This is the biggest thing that I focus on with younger people: working at something for a while that you may not like and building it into a job you love.

I wrote last year about how I created success in almost every job I had. I learned to become successful at every place I was at. If you want to love what you do, then learn to work hard and be successful at those things you don’t like to do. When you shine at it, opportunity will open up for those jobs that you will love to do.

In many cases people will chase after you to find what it is they love to do. They will spend years getting fired from jobs they don’t like and the whole the time they could have worked those jobs to open the doors to what they love to do. When coaching people and having them search for the ideas to find what they love to do, I often hear them tell stories about how they bought into a business deal, or took a training course, or even attended an online or in-town workshop. They get through it and then find out they really hate the work.

So often these people spend years of their lives chasing the money and not the work. In life you will have to do some kind of work to maintain a living. Learn to love what you do and find a way to be successful at all things, let it open doors to things you love. That is the reason at the end of every one of my blogs I put the line “love what you do and those you share life with.” It is because no matter what you do if you don’t love it, you will not work at it.

One of the greatest things I learned in building success at work was told to me years ago by a man who started looking for another job because he hated where he was. When talking with a coach, that coach told him to find a way to turn his current job into a success and find a way to love it. The coach told him then he could also put the word out that he was looking for other jobs. Well he built a team and that team became the most successful team of sales people in the entire company. It was when they became the success that this man was offered three other job opportunities. After building his team and taking them to the top sales team, he started to love where he was at and turned down all three job offers.

The lesson to learn in this is you can build a world you will love. You build your success at the job, you find the place to work and love where you are at, and then doors will open up. But once you have built the place you are at, you may find you don’t want to leave after all. That is how people build a success at their work or business and find what they love. Build yours today, if you don’t like it once you are successful at it, then you will see offers coming your way. Those that are the best at what they do are in demand. Think about that: if you found someone who was successful would you want to hire them to run a division of your company? Or would you rather choose one of those that failed and have no job to bring your company to success? It’s time to build a job you love and make yourself in demand.

I’m Tim Gillette the Rocker Life coach. It’s time to live your dream, to love what you do and those you share life with. Become a success at what you do and become the RockStar at doing it.

Successful People Around You

The middle of the week has arrived and that means that our theme of setting up your environment is halfway done. Monday we introduced the idea that the world around us – our environment – makes the difference in our success and yesterday we talked about our home being set up for success. Today let’s take it to a higher level.

For the past 20 years no matter who I was working with, even when I was in the auto industry, there were several areas I would say that could predict the success of someone five years down the line. Among those things were the books or things they read; what they did with the time they had; how they used the money, tools and seeds they had been given. But there is one especially important thing and that is the people they hang out with.

As a young teen I was given the advice from my parents and those who wanted to see me succeed in life to never hang out with the wrong crowd. When it comes to our friends we spend our free time with, or those we choose to form partnerships with, the idea of keeping positive people who can help build our world is important. Focus on building friendships that can only help you get to the places you want to go. Keeping a friend around who is always looking out for you is great.

And it’s not one-sided, not just about what people can do for you. Too many times in life we can chase people who we need to help us and forget about those who we need to help. But then I have met people who are all caught up in the path of finding those that need the help and not having someone to hang onto to keep them up.

Building relationships is the word we want to use here. In many cases I am building relationships and helping people who may someday surpass my success. Someday I may need to reach out to them to get back up. I once heard that you should have two kinds of people in life: those who are mentoring you to make you better, and those you are mentoring to help them be better.

In the many outings that I attend and the places that I go to speak, I meet so many people who are looking for me to help them out. I am all too excited to help them. After all, the mentors in my life were quick to grab my hand when I needed it most. When I was building my last car wash business. I had a close friend who I speak of often. His name was Richy and, at the time, he had many small companies and ideas floating around, but was co-owner with his brother of one of the bigger packaging companies here in the Dallas area.

Rich taught me the meaning of helping. He was always telling me ways to make my business life better. At the same time I was meeting with three other people in the car wash business helping them get through the tough times and find the niche of clients that kept them working. We all build those relationships to keep us moving forward and to keep us humble.

But let’s talk about one more set of relationships: Family. Most of us have several people in this category of relationships.

Mate or partner. This is one of the most precious of partnerships and relationships you have. You fell in love and joined your lives together. For the most part you are on the same page, but as we discussed yesterday with setting our house up for success we have to consider each other and make it our life together. For Gwynne and me, it’s not hard. We fit together very well, but we still have different tastes and from time to time, to set our lives for success, we must compromise and come to a mutual agreement to keep that relationship strong. After all we grew up in different worlds and met and combined worlds.

Kids. If you have kids they are one very important relationship for you. If yours are younger, you need to spend some time doing what may seem like strange things they like to do. As they get older, you must mentor them and train them to go out into the real world and be able to handle it. Also realize they may grow up and become different than you are. I am still reminded of my Dad and his extreme politics. While I have some of his beliefs, other ideas I think he was too extreme on. Which brings me to my last family members.

Parents. In our house Gwynne’s father is part of the home we share. The joys that make his life are a big concern to her as he is not as young as we are. We have many great times together sitting down to play Scrabble many evenings, having him join us in different activities we do, attending events we all like together. The other part is my mom. She also is widowed now, but off serving on a mission trip overseas which she wanted to do. Our parents are not going to be with us forever. Like the relationships we build in mentoring, I often would talk to my dad about how to handle life. Remember, our parents experienced it once before; use their knowledge to set up your future for success.

In life we will have many relationships. There are those built on friendship to help us become RockStar success stories. There are those that will get cut short due to their time being up before ours. Each person you meet today is part of the environment of success you need for your tomorrow. So build those relationships; they will last longer than homes, jobs, or things.

I’m Tim Gillette, the Rocker Life Coach. It’s time to live your dream, to love what you do and Love those you share life with. Build relationships that take you to a RockStar life.

A Peaceful Home

Good Tuesday morning to you. It’s day two of Environment Week and there is a question I want to ask: is everything working well for you in your home?  Is your home the place you cannot wait to get back to each day? Many people don’t think about how important their homes can be to their success, but let’s think about this for a moment. If you were living in a home with no peace and you could not get enough rest each day, how productive would you be in your world?

A recent commercial for Holiday Inn Express focused on the concept of getting restful night’s sleep. It showed people being able to do things that they are not trained to do and then saying “I’m not the pilot of this plane, but I stayed in a Holiday Inn Express last night and got a great night’s sleep.” The commercial brings about a point that I wanted to make today: How much further could you go towards your goals if you started each day rested and went to work with a peaceful mindset?  How well could you perform any duties you needed to if you had less stress at home?

To keep your life a success, no matter what kind of home you have, you must build your home it to be that place you cannot wait to get back to. If you live in a home like we do you, with eight people sharing five bedrooms, you may have to find your corner of the home to build your success. I have three simple steps for making your home your peaceful and productive place.

1.  Set up your own comfort zone. I said there are eight of us currently living in the house but two of them are moving out soon. With that move, we are working to create a better office space for me as well as opening up space for our Couchsurfers and family guests while still meeting the needs of those of us who will continue to live here. We are setting up our patios so we can all have an outside relaxation place. The key is I work from home I but do not want to carry my work in every part of the home. So we are working to set it up spaces that are for the entire family, spaces that are just for us, and spaces that are just for work. No matter how you set your home up it must be set up to work for you.

2.  Learn the settings of color and decoration. When it comes to my personal decorating taste, it is not what most would expect from a long haired biker guy. I love to have my space clean neat and looking like it was professionally decorated. When I moved in with Gwynne it was tough to get used to the color. Her bedroom had a combination of five colors. She is a colorful person and we are working on a combination for repainting before our wedding. She wants eggshell white, with a stucco faux finish. We will be very close to that with maybe an accent wall for my taste. The thing is it will be a combination of us both, making our room a place of peace and harmony for both of us. When you set up rooms in your home you must keep this in mind. You might want to hire a decorator or perhaps have a Feng Shui expert come in and make it yours. If you share the space, you must make it work together, which takes me to the last point.

3.  Keep your home a peaceful place for all that are living in it. I spent years renting rooms, so I learned to deal with others’ living situations. The best arrangement in those days was the three plus years I lived with my roommate, Jannie. We had our own areas, but also had common living areas. In our home here, we also have common living areas and private personal areas. We all work on different schedule so the house could have activity going on just about 24 hours a day. But we’ve set it up to be quiet during certain times, no matter what, to accommodate those who have set work schedules. So you have to set your home up to work with all whom live there to have the peace they need.

Setting your home up to give peace, as a place for you to rest, is what will help you in building that success you want in 2012. After all, we need to rest sometime and if you are never at a place to get that rest you are keeping yourself from success.

I’m Tim Gillette, the Rocker Life Coach. It’s time for you to live your dream to love what you do and those you share life with. Set your home up for peace in your life to be the RockStar in your world.